I know this may come as a MASSIVE shock to you all, but I am lazy. I am basically a human version of the sloth (by the way, I love sloths and they’re highly underrated. But that’s for another time). I am a late riser, lover of sweat pants, and binge show watching gal. But I have to say – I am extreme. As much as I am lazy, I am a crazy endless worker. Like, there is no happy median for me – it’s either work work work work work (only sang in Rihanna tone) or sloth sloth sloth sloth sloth (only sang in Chef Priyanka tone).

ANYWAYS – this past weekend was no different. It was New Year’s day, a rainy and gloomy day in NYC, Omicron (or whichever transformer variant) was raging all over, so I had no desire to leave my apartment. But when it came time to dinner and I opened my fridge, I realized I had no produce. Literally nothing, because I had been at my parents for nearly 10 days rolling around like a sloth (of course). But in my raging hunger and impatience, one of my best dishes was born – my Lazy Woman’s Chili Oil Noodles. Don’t be fooled – these aren’t just all carbs! I’ve snuck in a few healthy ingredients and a bit of Indian flair. It is shockingly good and shockingly easy (and to mention shockingly not authentic in any way possible). Enjoy my noods! 😉

Lazy Woman’s Chili Oil Noodles: 

Chili Oil: 

1/2 tsp each: 

• cumin seeds 
• coriander seeds 
• white sesame seeds 
• red crushed pepper 
• kashmiri red chili powder
• 1 clove
• 1/2 cinnamon stick
• 2-3 tbsp dry roasted unsalted peanuts
• 3 cloves garlic sliced
• 1/2 inch piece ginger sliced
• 1/4 cup neutral oil (grapeseed, canola, or vegetable)
• 1 tbsp dark soy sauce
• 1 tsp sugar
• 1 tbsp ground flaxseed 

Noods: 

• 6oz noodles or pasta
• water to boil
• pinch of kosher salt
• 1/2 cup vegan egg scrambled – I used Just Egg (my fav) 

Method: 

1. Place all ingredients for the chili oil (except for soy sauce, sugar and flaxseed) in a large bowl. Heat up neutral oil over medium heat until shimmering and hot. A good test is adding in one sesame seed to the hot oil and if it immediately pops to the top sizzling, oil is ready. CAREFULLY pour oil over spices and stir. Let sit for 30 minutes at least. 

2. Boil noodles or pasta until al dente and set aside. 

3. Add soy sauce, sugar and flaxseed to the chili oil. Mix and add in cooked noodles and egg. Mix thoroughly. Top with sesame seeds and enjoy immediately!